The Cost of Maturity

Ever since I first started fully embracing my geek way of life I began noticing a difference in the way we do and view things versus how some others do. One of the most pervasive differences I saw wasn't something I was able to easily put into words. It was fundamental, I knew that. I also felt that helped create my happiness and I saw it causing others pain. Still, I struggled to define it.

Then Pokémon GO was released and I finally realized what it was: maturity. A lot of the world has this strange obsession with being mature, responsible, and taking things seriously. Humour, levity, silliness are all very well, so say some, but under very strictly defined rules and guidelines for appropriateness. Making a joke or appearing “immature” at the wrong time or in the wrong place is frowned on.

This is not to say that I want to treat everything in my life as a joke, nor do I think that respecting others’ wishes about conduct is unimportant. Just because I like to play Pokémon GO does not mean I'd intentionally break a social contract to knowingly cause someone else discomfort.

That being said, who exactly is being hurt by me playing the game, or cosplaying, or watching cartoons, or acting silly, on my time, in my own space? Someone once told me my day is made too easily. I'm sure they didn't mean that as a compliment, but that's how I choose to take it. If I still take the same innocent joy in a bird or a cloud or a bad pun as I did when I was 5 years old, then that may very well be a definition of success I am satisfied with.

There is also, of course, a need in many lives for professionalism. I would not get many clients for my coaching services if I emailed them as a five-year-old. This kind of gravity is necessary for gaining the trust of someone who wishes to engage you in any kind of professional capacity. I will always maintain, however, that I would far rather work with someone who, after the initial contact and trust is gained, ends an email with a smiley rather than “sincerely”.

I don't think I'd want to force everyone in the world to begin taking things less seriously and be silly. That would be just as wrong as their judgement of me for my games and puns. However, I do wonder at the cost of such a lifestyle and thought process.

What does maturity look like to you?

The Art of the Geek Ninja

Here's the deal: not everyone cares about the things we love. They won't be counting down the hours until the next Star Wars movie, they don't cover their bodies, their homes, their cars, and their lives with references, and they won't necessarily want to hear about the book you were reading last night. Even if it was really good, and... No. Some people, incredible as it may seem, just don't care about that stuff.

It's sad for them, but take heart! You have recourse! You can begin your training in the stealth arts of the geek. No murder required!

The art of the geek ninja sometimes requires patience. Laying in wait for the perfect outfit that you can wear to work but more importantly is actually a perfect feminine version of your latest cosplay.

It sometimes requires bravery. That oil painting might look abstract to the casual observer, but you know it's actually an exploding time machine, painted by a mad-man.

And sometimes it requires just the right moment...

When I was married, my now husband and I knew we wanted to make the wedding our own, wanted it to reflect who we truly are. And who we truly are is a couple of geeks. The shirt I made for him to wear is part of a cosplay, my dress was a medieval pattern, he cut the cake with a lightsaber, there was a Pokemon reference in our vows, but my favourite stealth geek part of our wedding was the most subtle of all.

As our guests assembled in the church, a musically-inclined cousin played the piano. We'd given him a stately, slow piece that sounded perfect for entering a church for a wedding. Or, you know, entering a temple devoted to time in order to go back and save your kingdom from the darkness you can only fight as a child.

Every piece of music was from a game both of us had played. At the reception our gaming friends ran up to us, demanding to know where they’d heard those pieces before. And I'm certain all the non-gamers had no clue what they had been hearing.

Now, go forth, and spread your love of all things geek upon the world. But do it... Stealthily.